Good Day

I went to the munch which was fun. I left the parents house at 8pm to go, and I got back at 4:45am. It was a gooooooood night. Lots of good talking.

Oh, and I made curry for the family which turned out really well, so I'm jazzed about that.

And I need sleep.

Jake

Ruse and relatives

Well, the eloborate ruse worked. My grandpa had absolutely no idea that there was a surprise party for him and he enjoyed it a great deal. Good times were had by all.....well, except my uncle, but he very recently had back surgery and had to fly in and his back hurt. But good times were had by all others.

The relations (yes, I used that word because I'm weird, not because I don't know "relatives") are in town and I will be doing some entertaining tomorrow. And I may try cooking curry for the frist time in my life. Mmmmm....curry.

Dawson is taking my car to another state. Which was fine. Until the breaks completely failed on the car I was going to take. Not sure how I'm going to get to Chicago this weekend. Anyone up for a roadtrip?

I think I may be about to do something dumb tomorrow, but I'm committed to doing it.

Jake Bullet

Post Xmas

Well, no ones killed anyone over the holidays, right? There were no screaming matches which where augmented by liberal amounts of eggnog? No yelling of phrases like "I wish your mother had never farted you out of her womb!"? No? Good, excellent. Moving along.

Well, as per usual, it has taken Dawson and I about 3 days to realize why we moved out. Here are the variety of things we have been scolded for:

#Dawson's haircut (it looks like a drunk person cut it, and thats probably what happened, but he likes it and frankly looks good in it)
#I don't "properly sleep in the bed" (I refuse to use flat sheets because I don't like them, just a comforter and fitted sheet, and apparently this is bad.....and I've been doing it for 10 years, so this is news to me)
#Dawson and I are both leaving town for New Years (drinking a bottle of champagne and hitting the sheets at 1am isn't appealing to either of us. He's heading to Iowa, I'm headed to the perv club)
#Language. Okay, this one I'll cop to. The phrase "Eat my ass" isn't very nice, but I say it with love and affection ::sweet puppy dog eyes::
#Grandpas party. I'm not even going to discuss this. There is just way too much effort going into the surprise aspect.

Anyway, Xmas went well. Many gifts I am hoping for will likely arrive in about 3 weeks due to it being the anniversary of my birth. I don't want a party. I just want someone to tie me down and hurt me till I cry, then hold me and kiss away tears. And an iPod. Thats ALL. And for the record, I am 21. And not for the first time. I'll be 21 till I turn 65 and am eligible for a Senior discount. 21 damn years old. And I don't need any lip about it.

Xmas Dinner went very well. Dawson ate some bad tort the night before and was out of commission for helping, but The Dad stepped in nicely. And he had no comments about my kicking new apron. And he was more than happy to play a supporting role and follow directions. The food was excellent, I stayed at the dinner table long enough to sample everything and watch everyone eat for signs of anything gone wrong. When I saw and tasted everything and knew it went well, I went and laid down on a couch near the table and closed my eyes and carried on conversations whilst half asleep. Cooking for 7 hours is tough.

I think I'm going to cook stuff again this afternoon.

Seeing Dawson is grand. I miss him when he isn't here.

Um, I got some rockin gifts including an Indian cookbook (mmmmmm....erotic curries) and a "Wusthof" chefs knife. Now Wusthof is the best type of knife in the world, but an 8" Chef's Knife is $110 and thats without any wood block to hold it or anything fancy, just the knife.

So The Dad got me a very nice Martha Stewart knife that was "engraved". Here is what the "engraving" on Xerox paper read (in part) "Dear Customer, We swear this really is a Whatsit brand knife.....er Wusthof knife. We've just been selling them like hot cakes and ran out of packaging. So we called up Martha and worked out a deal to package the Whatsit brand knifes. She's kinda been down on her luck since that whole prison thing. Enjoy your German Whatsit knife".

I have to admit I did laugh at that, alot actually. And I really didn't expect a Wusthof, it was a joke on my list, but I needed a good knife.

I also got copper pans!!! How awesome, hella functional and cool looking. I am so going to be chefing it up next semester.

Its been a good holiday so far. Toodles.

Jake Bullet

YAR!!!!

For those few of you who don't read Twisted Monk (and why the hell don't you) you have to check this out.

At the Security job, Andrew is about ready to stab people. To castrate them really. Why? For the second time in 2 weeks, one of our keysets is missing. Considering that our primary job is controlling access to various parts of the building and that keyset can get you in 90% of the rooms here, its not very good. Thankfully, I was not on duty when the keyset grew legs and ran off. Apperently the last shift did 6 building tours (we normally do 2-4 per shift) looking for the keys. Andrew is seriously gonna stab somebody.

I got to bake today which is great. And on Xmas, I get to spend the day cooking. Menus is as follows. Turkey with dressing in bird. Whipped potatoes (You said whipped, HA HA!). Corn. From scratch gravy. Glazed carrots. Baked Mac and Cheese (All from Scratch, plus I found some absolutely beautiful, well aged cheeses to do it with). Cranberry stuff. And rolls. Dawson is helping me cook and I am totally jazzed. I mean, like, doing actual jazz hands jazzed.

Well, time to go explore the building and look for that damn keyset, I'll bet if I find it, Andrew would blow me right in the middle of the office.

Jake Bullet

Baking

I have a brand new apron.

I have nothing to do today except pick up 2 additional gifts, and frankly, I could take care of that tomorrow.

My parents have a very well stocked kitchen and so.......

I plan to spend my entire day baking. From scratch. Just because I can.

Right now my idea of heaven goes a little like this: My own Mini Cooper, a job in a proper kitchen, and a full set of Wusthof Trident knives that belong to me, and a bottle of very good Whiskey. Right now, if I had those things, I believe I could keel over and die, happy as can be.

I really need help, but for now, I'll have to be happy with just making all manner of cookies and pies.

Jake Bullet

Quote of the Day

I'm bringing back quote of the day, if for no other reason than to ammuse myself.

From the Daily Show

-Stephen Colbert: After all, it was Thomas Jefferson who said "Everyone imposes his own system as far as his army can reach."
-Jon Stewart: No, that was Stalin. Thomas Jefferson said that he'd "Rather have free press and no government, than a government and no free press".
-Stephen Colbert: Well, what else would you expect from a slave-banging, Hitler loving queer?

Jake Bullet

A decision

I left the non security job back in November. There were a variety of reasons why, but I didn't leave under the best of circumstances and I swore I'd never go back.

And now, they are kind of in a jam. It would have happened regardless of whether I was there or not, but I can fix it. I know that I can fix it without too much work. But, I don't care whether the problem gets fixed or not. And secretly, I'd like to see my old boss suffer a little for being an asshole. Here's the kicker.

Andrew is incharge of fixing it. And said he wants me to help. And he's been authorized to offer me certain incentives (read mad cash and certain work conditions) in order to come back for a month.

Basicially, I'd be guaranteed about 6 weeks salary just for walking in the door, plus a full additionally months salary if I meet certain targets.

I'm not sure whether to do it or not. I do get to write my own contract and don't have to deal with certain annoying details which caused the leaving, but still.

I'll keep everyone up to speed.

Jake Bullet

What a night

What a night. Normally, one is supposed to go out, drink, get food and then go home. Not repeat the same thing twice. But then again, I've never let words like "Normally" or "usually" get in my way. Here's how everything went down.

First and foremost, my pubic hair is intact. When I called to make appointments for the Fairy and I, I was told in a not very nice manner that this particular salon will not wax boy bits. I've been trying to figure out why.....Do some boys get hard, making things uncomfortable for the waxer? Or do boys cry or not show up or forget to grab a shower before going?? Oh well, I'm sure within a week or so the Fairy and I will make another attempt.

On to the libations.

So, it was Thursday, and that can only really mean on thing. It was time to drink. Drink and hang out with perverts. Good times indeed. And I had a lovely time. There were perverts and drinking and half naked women. For the record, having a woman I barely know show off new nipple and hood piercings used to be something to right home about. Now, its standard operating procedure. But yeah, I got to chat with alot of people, and tossed around some ideas with our illustrious group leader (more on this if it ever materializes) and generally just relax and be around like minded people. Well, then the Fairy and I went to an all night diner to grab food. And we chatted and laughed and generally had a lovely time. And by the time I took her home, I was tired and a little buzzed from the night.

Well, as I was almost home my phone started vibrating, telling me I had a new voicemail. It was Andrew, he had called hours earlier looking to drink. But for some reason I didn't get the voicemail till nearly midnight. Oh well, I called him back and told him I'd be there in 5 minutes. So we drove around and headed to a club that I have drive by dozens of times without ever knowing it existed. And apparently, Thursday is "gay night" at the club. Where every queer within 10 miles heads over for extremely loud music and absolutely delicious looking bartenders. And its not in the fruit loop which was a little weird. And so we went, and hung out and managed to chat which was great. And what was also nice was I saw an old friend, the first person who ever put me in any kind of bondage ever (fist mitts, with locks on, on the first date, I know....stupid, but hot). And I got to talk to that boy a bit, now time to decide whether or not to call him, I dunno if I will. But yeah, good times, Andrew and I left a little before last call, and once we finally regained our sense of hearing, I dropped him at his place and headed back to mine.....completely exhausted.

But it was a good night. And odds are the Fairy and Andrew and I will go drinking on Monday in the fruit loop as the Fairy and I have started doing. And after hitting the Munch Thursday, Andrew and I will likely end up back down in the fruit loop. Good times.

Well, time for me to pretend to be doing work.....stupid work. Till later.

Jake Bullet

Sometimes I'm not bright

Well then. So, you see, the thing is.....I can often easily be convinced to do foolish things. Drink too much, wear funny hats, or engage in unusual sexual practices. Normally, none of these things hurt much nor do I regret them afterwards (usually).

Unfortunately, I did agree to do something fairly stupid about a week ago. And today is the day it will be done......in all likely hood. I agreed to accompany a friend and get waxed.

Not like its the first time. I regularly have my eyebrows waxed to keep them well shaped and I am still quite manly thank you very much. No, no, no. The particular region to be waxed is not my eyebrows.

No, our region of interest is slightly below the waist, and well above the knees. Currently my 'pink bits' occupy that region.

Yes, I am having my pubic hair ripped out via hot wax. Am I crying about it? Not yet. Will I be driven to drink because of it? Very likely. Was this a very stupid idea? Yes, yes it was.

The ONLY reassuring thing is that previously, having my eyebrows waxed, combined with the proper breathing and a little mental work usually puts me in a very light sub space. The pain is just right to get those nice heady endophins kicking. Hopefully, when some evil Russian woman rips out my thatch, I'll get a similar endophin kick.

I think I'm going to go drink now.

Jake

fibs

Like all humans, sometimes I lie. Here is a list of fibs I've tried over the past week which have failed.

-It wasn't me. (Ussually defeated with either a "bullshirt" or a raised eyebrow)

-I could give up SM any time I wanted (I ussually can't even finish saying it without seriously cracking up)

-{fill in the blank} doesn't turn me on (I never manage to say it with a straight face)

-No (People always figured out I mean yes)

-Yes (same as above, but in reverse)

-I'd never do that! (Problem being that my motto is "I'll try damned near anything twice)

Grrrr, alright too bed me thinks.

Jake

Obsessed

I've been obsessed lately.

that's not at all unusual for me. Its actually normally a good thing. I get very enamored by a topic for a few days or a few weeks and then let it go. It helps me learn a little bit about alot of things. But usually I get obsessed with something political, cultural or historical. Major world events, some esoteric political maneuver or the newest curry recipe are normal sorts of temporary fascinations for me. Right now, I'm obsessed with something different.

I've been obsessed with collars. A specific type of collar really. Imagine this......but don't imagine very hard because I'll have a picture soon enough. For example, the picture right over there. Yes that one. The one of the collar on the boy. (And no, thats not me, though, truth be told, I'd fuck him.) A steel metal bar, less than 1/2 inch across thats been bent into a circle and placed around someone's neck. Add in an almost undetectable hinge and a small recessed allen screw holding it locked into place. Discrete enough to easily wear to the office and simple call "Neo-Industrial jewelry" when asked by the coworkers. Designed so its absolutely not coming off without a specially designed allen wrench to remove it. Just a simple steel ring that says so so much to the right people.

I really really want one and I don't know why. I want one and I want to wear it and never take it off. I have *never* had a thing for locking metal collars before. And certainly not as a 24/7 accessory. Don't get me wrong, the idea of being given a collar has always intrigued me and I look forward to the day I get collared, but I've always imagined it as a leather collar to be worn at home and with like minded people at munches and conventions. And without a lock. I've always been way too worried about what happens if I'm in the office and a bugler comes in to steal my shirt, then what would people say?? I mean besides "Woah, that dude just stole your shirt". They may say things like " Hey Jake, you work in a professional office...what are you doing with what looks like a collar on your neck...and why is there a lock???" That would be less than good for me as far as a job goes.

But these collars, I mean, I think they could be passed off as a "normal" piece of jewelry with a little thought and creative fibbing. "Oh yes, my partner got me that for our anniversary, its neo-industrial jewelry. I thought it looked really cool". That could explain away to the vanilla world why I would be openly wearing a collar. And to those in the lifetyle, it would simply be a collar, a semi-discrete one, but a collar none the less.

I have actually dreamed the last 2 nights about being collared with a collar like that. That's actually really the only parts I remember about the dreams. But the parts about the collar are clear as can fucking be. They were good dreams I think. I think this little obsession started when I was reading part of Jay Wiseman's book SM 101. (Absolutely great book, btw) He was describing collars and there significance, some things about different types of collars, and his views on collars. And something just kind of struck me and so I started surfing to different SM stores I knew of, looking at there collars. And I saw one at JT Stockroom that was an all metal ring with a small hinge and lock on it. That sort of started the fascination with the metal ones.

And what's funny, is the necklace I wear, well, it has been mistaken for a collar before. Its a small sterling silver row of double rings that sits very high on my neck. And it has no clasp, all there is a a small jumper ring which I need to use a needle nose pliers to slide open and closed. I can't remember the last time I took it off, but I do know that the last time I did, I felt totally naked without it. I kept reaching up to gently tug on it....something I do randomly alot of the time and I was truly confused when I would reach up for it and find nothing.

One day I hope to be gently tugging against a real collar. But for now, the necklace will do....

Feel free to share your thoughts.

Jake Bullet

Cutting....mmmmmmmm

So what a freaking weekend was that, definitely better than heading out with the parents to see family.

I spent much of the weekend setting up, attending, and tearing down the Holiday Fetish Fair in Chicago. Which I will share stories of very soon. The other part of the weekend was spending several hours in a public dungeon when I am a brand spanking new member. I did two fucking amazing scenes that night at the club. First, I helped TOP a scene!! I know! Me! Mr Ninja, 2 other Doms and I all "gang-topped" Mrs Ninja for there first wedding anniversary. But that story will wait till just a little later. And stories of the Fetish Fair itself will also wait, though I will say that it was nice to see old and new friends there.

Todays story is about the cutting scene that Mr Ninja and I did after we gang topped his wife. This is the second time Ninja and I have played together and both times have been cutting scenes, which I am starting to like more and more. The Piercer was the one who initially taught Ninja how to cut, and he learned his lessons very well.

The first scene we did together was alot of fun and a perfect opportunity to "test drive" the sensations of needles and scalpels on my flesh. And it was a great scene and it left very nice, artistic cuts on my back. But this time, I think we were both in the mood for something fast, hard, and aggressive.

We got set up on a spanking bench after throwing down a drop cover and negotiating some of the specifics. Basically, my part of negotiation involved saying "Just like before except harder, deeper, faster, scarier and blooder". After stripping down, Mr Ninja did some Rough body play on my back, punching and slapping my back and ass. That really warmed my back up and got all the nerves ready and awakened. Then I got tied down to the bench with wrist cuffs and ropes holding down my legs. Then we started. And it was amazing...mindblowing and painful as fuck.

He started hard on my shoulder blades with (I think) needles cutting long hard squiggly lines into me. I was flying so hard I'm not sure of what all happened, but I do know this. He really played up the fear aspect when he was cutting near my kidneys and told me in this evil domly voice that one little extra push and the scalpel would nail my kidneys. He totally rocked the blood aspect by periodically wiping the blood off my back and forcing me to look at it, telling me that it was mine and that alot more was to come. He started hard and fast and I could fee the cuts were deeper, which was great. And in classic me fashion, towards the end I swore I would get my revenge and started cursing at him. Which is always a great sign from me that I'm grooving on the sensation and that I'm really being pushed good and hard.

Oh, I almost forgot the very best part. Once he had mostly finished his work, Ninja signed his name on me. Let me repeat that, as it bears repeating. He signed my back using a scalpel! He put his initials and the date on my left back, near the kidney. Now, lets talk about how much that is a turn on for a guy with a thing for marks. Not only did he mark me from shoulder blades to my waist. Not only did he draw a fair amount of blood and cause me the most wonderful pain. He marked me, but more than that. He made his mark on me. ::drool:: No one else walked out of the club with that type of mark. I mean, talk about your possessive, "you're mine right now" actions. Its making me hot just touching the mark. I just love that mark, thats the specialist one of the bunch.

It was just a great scene and I got alot of complements on the marks and the scene that night and the next day at the fair. I think that cuttings and bloodplay are slowly becoming one of my favorite things for a couple of reasons. First, I just find the edgeplay aspect and the openly flowing blood idea hot. I mean, I know its weird, but its hot when a guy makes me bleed, especially since I asked for me. Second, its an opportunity to get really close to the top I'm playing with. You can use a bullwhip from 20 feet away and alot of impact play is done from a few feet away. But cutting and bloodplay, you have to be close, you have to be touching each other. And thats something I really like. But I just really like the type of pain that the needles and scalpels bring out. Its sharp and heavy and hard but stays for quite awhile. Its easily controlled, but I'm not the one controlling it. I really do just love cuttings and they marks.

You know, like piercing and electro play....I swore I would never do cuttings. Now its definately near the top of my list. I need to stop turning soft limits into fetishes, it ruins the phrase "I'd never do that".

Hopefully, I get a chance to play with Ninja again and maybe I'll get the opportunity to help top Mrs Ninja again one of these days.

Tomorrow, I'm off to the munch and I'll also try to post on how the Fair itself went and what it was like to help top Mrs Ninja.

Jake Bullet

Cooking

I actually ate remarkable little for Thanksgiving. Not that I've ever really viewed the day as a time for competitive eating and the lot, but things cropped up which prevented me from gorging too much.

Was it because the food is burned?

Or because there was a blazing row over dinner with the relatives?

Or am I on some new fangled diet?

Or because I was alone at my apartment, eating a turkey sub?

Well, no, it was none of those. I spent the day cooking, which normally, I leave to others on this day.

See, because of the Holiday Fetish Fair, plus some other engagements earlier in the weekend, I choose not to accompany my family to Detroit. See, since before my parents were married, before I was even a thought in there minds and before they had there current jobs, they have been making this annual jaunt to Detroit to see my fathers family. And I could actually predict, with startling accuracy, what the events of the trip will be. Where everyone will shop. Who was over for dinner. Which items were specially prepared for whom. What the general topics of conversation will be. Its a nice trip and one I have enjoyed a great many times, but I've sort of outgrown it.

So I decided to spend the day with my grandfather and cook for us. We spend very little time together and so it seemed like a nice idea. And we got ourselves a bird and I agreed to cook.

Since my parents have a much better kitchen for doing major cooking events (I think I just invented a term there), I made a motion to cook there. And everything went fairly well. We even cleaned up and my mother should come back and find her kitchen looking quite nice, and not at all like a disaster area.

The menu included:
-A small turkey, covered in various seasonings and cooked with dressing inside
-Cornbread dressing with fresh onion and pork sausage
-Garlic mashed potatoes from scratch. I modified my mothers recipe slightly, and I think I have an idea for how to make a few subtle improvements to my modifications
-Gravy from scratch and
-Corn.

We also had some pumpkin pie (store bought) and some veggies and dip to munch on during the preparation. And it should be noted that except for the potatoes and corn, I had never prepared any of the other dishes before. And the potatoes I have generally done with the supervision/assistance of my mother.

I started prepping the bird and doing the dressing at about 11am and we finally sat down around 5ish. So that's 6 hours of cooking. And there wasn't much time to sit down once the bird was in the oven, because I was constantly basting it and checking everything. Plus after the stuffing and bird were done I had to strike and reset the kitchen and I was constantly pulling out pots and pans to take care of the next round of preparation.

And it was fun. I honestly had quite a bit of fun. I love to cook when I have a proper kitchen and proper ingredients, which I had. I love to cook when I can run the kitchen how I like and when I have enough room to maneuver around. And I love to cook when I can turn it into performance art, which I was able to do because my grandfather got to see my cooking skills and there is so much leftover that the parents will be able to taste it.

But I was so freaking tired that after eating just enough to make sure everything came out well, I layed down to watch the last quarter of the game and relax and I promply fell asleep and didn't wake up for 2 hours. And then I was up just enough to finish with the second half of the dishes.

It was a nice thanksgiving all in all. And I think I'm going to try to plan more major cooking events in the future. But first, I need a 4 sided apron. After all, what's cuter than a boy who can cook in a kitchen in a little apron?

Jake Bullet

Forgot this bit

Best quote from the drive by Jonathan and I

After talking with his mom on the phone about checking the internal temp of the bird with a meat thermometer.
-Jake(in a very resigned voice): Jonathan, I just....Jonathan, take this for what its worth, but never accidentally switch the rectal probe with the meat thermometer....(long sigh)...its just better for everyone involved
-Jonathan (giggling): I can't believe you said that
-Jake(still very serious and dry): See, the meat thermometer is sharp and when you're inserting it into a human colon, well, that's just a little uncomfortable for all involved, what with the perforation of the bowels and the blood and the crying and screaming. Plus then you end up with partially cooked bird parts in your ass, and no one likes that....well, almost no one...but we don't talk about those sickos (saying the sickos part in a very hauty voice)
-Jonathan (crying with laughter): partially cooked bird parts in the ass?????
-Jake: yeah, its just not tasty like that, not at all (shudders)
-Jonathan: I can't believe I haven't had you killed yet. No more talkie for you anymore
-Jake: And you try wiping the lube off a rectal probe and then jamming it in the side of a turkey, its, well, its difficult Jonathan, I won't lie to you, I've tried these things before. And lube does not make a good seasoning, better to stick to....well, you know, not lube
-Jonathan: (smacks me and laughs more)

I'm a little evil sometimes.

Jake Bullet

Jonathan

Look to the right, lots of new fabo links. Enjoy in good health, more will be coming soon. I've got one or two more blogs I may add, plus several new BDSM and political links

So I picked Jonathan up from the airport today and we had many lovely conversations...about friends, which friends we thought might also be perverts (Jonathan is not a pervert, but he knows I am), our love lives, his trip, people who talk on the plane because they forgot to buy a magazine, the good old days and of course politics. Some of the winning lines of the night are as follows:

After he talked to his mom on the phone about cooking a turkey.
-Jake: Now Jonathan, you know that when you clean the bird, you can't actually use dish soap, it hurts the taste....just plain water is all that’s allowed
-Jonathan(Without missing a beat, totally sarcastic/serious): Really?? I just figured I could toss it in the dishwasher or something….

Later in the night when refilling the gas.
-Jonathan, What kind of fuel does this beast take?
-Jake (look of disbelief): Regular. Plain, ole regular. If there was anything less than regular, I'd use that. Shit, if I could get away with it, I'd fill the tank with kerosene and water, but the car people frown on that policy.
-Jonathan (choking with laughter): Kerosene and water it is....maybe I should add my gum wrapper for fiber!
-Jake: Screw your fiber!

We also talked about the confluence of small, seemingly random events that brought us to where we are in our lives. Attending the same school. Me attending a meeting. Him being convinced to go on a trip. A girl not doing her job, allowing him to take the job. Me volunteering. Him trusting me when he had no reason to. So many little things. God, what would life have been like if the line at the greasy spoon had been shorter and I had skipped his meeting??? I wouldn't be at this school. I wouldn't be a Poli Sci major. I likely would have dropped out of college altogether. He wouldn't have gotten the job that was his stepping-stone to his last 3 jobs. Half our friends would have never met one another. God, what if that line had been shorter??? Or if he had said “Screw You” when I volunteered??? I don't even know who I would be right now. Its weird to think about those what ifs. But I’m glad things turned out the way they did. Really really glad.

That’s why sometimes I thank the Gods and Goddesses above for long lines.

Jake Bullet

Update number 8374

Well, here's where we are.

I recieved Chef! today which was nice and according to the Amazon people, I should be getting my books plus Newsradio and Office Space soon enough. Good times.

I will be going down to Chicago early to help set up the LeatherSins Holiday Fetish Fair and hopefully I will be staying at the House of Z while I am down there. That should be good fun. I may be obtaining a membership at GD2 while I am there, maybe not. But either way I get to see fun people and hopefully buy a few fun things. On the "To Purchase" list is the following: clover clamps, wartenberg wheel and leather paddles. I may pick up a few knives down there from Katana and I also will be ordering some heavy duty wrist and ankle cuffs from Katana. Plus I'll pick up anything that strikes my fancy.

Right now I am at Jonathan's house, he's asleep. I should be too. We are getting up in about 2.5 hours and driving to Chicago so that he can go see a cute girl. I fully support the out of state travel for sex and perversion. Thouhg with Jonathan, it will just be sex. I know he'll have fun. I should go to bed soon.

I now have the final item needed for the new box in my toybag. Heres whats in the box right now:

#Neosporin - for cleaning and soothing wounds
#Bandages - for covering wounds and cuts
#Gauze pads - same as above
#Tape - to hold the Bandages to the skin
#Forceps - For holding alcohol soaked cotton balls for fire play
#Needles - 100 brand new 23 gauge needles that just beg to be poked into my skin. Good times.
#Scalpels - 10 hospital grade scalpels for cutting scenes.
#Heavy duty shower curtain - A drop cloth for blood play scenes. I will be talking to the Piercer soon enough to find something better to use
#Lidocaine spray - helps with the itch associated with fresh cuts and scratches
#Alcohol - for fireplay plus its good to clean an area before cutting
#Gloves - I am a very firm believer in barrier protection for all kinds of play
#Sharps Container - Well, I was just going to leave used, uncapped needles on the dungeon floor, but then I realized that wasn't very nice

That box is now my box for fireplay and blood sports equipment. All packed away nice and neat. Now all I need is a delightfully evil Domly person to offer to cut me. *offers up my cutest look ever* Good times.

Alright well. Time to sign off. I've got a draft of a journal entry about BDSM and self body image. Its needs organization and tweaking, but it should turn out quite nicely. I'm sure you will all enjoy it.

Till then...

Jake Bullet

Amazon Dot Com Whore

I know, Amazon.com has been around for years. I know, everyone’s already heard of it and everyone already uses it. But recently, I've started to become an Amazon.com whore, I go there and see about 10,000 things I want to buy. What’s in the next shipment that I'm waiting for?

Jay Wiseman's Erotic Bondage Handbook - At Kinky Kollege, I had the opportunity to meet Jay and also help him sell a few books. I picked up SM 101 there and highly enjoyed it. And now I need another book on rope bondage. Midori's book is great, but I've heard that Jay Wiseman's is perfect for practical instructions on 1 and 2 column ties and many other practical knots. I may have the need to use those soon so I figured this was as good as an excuse to buy the book as I was ever going to find.

The Last Human - In Britain , two men named Rob Grant and Doug Naylor created the Red Dwarf series. A series which I am happily obsessed with. They wrote the series under the pen name Grant Naylor, but unfortunately, they split up. They no longer write together and they were 2/3rds of the way through a trilogy of books when this happened. So each one separately finished it. This is Doug Naylors conclusion to the series and I really want to see how he envisioned things ending.

Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns: The Romance and Sexual Sorcery of Sadomasochism - Okay, admittedly I got this book because the website said if I ordered more then they'd give me a discount. But in reality, this book as been on my "to read" list for quite some time. I always enjoy reading SM related books because invariably I learn things about myself from them. And its always fun to come up with new and fascinating ideas.

Office Space Special Edition with Flair - Okay another purchase I suckered into with the "Buy more and we'll give you money back" offer. But more so than that, I just find this movie hilarious, simply freaking hilarious. Plus the guy who plays Milton (Stephan Root) is one of my favorite actors.

Chef! The Complete Series - Odds are you have never heard of this show. Ever. Its okay, I don't look down on you because of it. It’s an obscure British comedy that I found one night on PBS. And it’s hilarious. I mean I love British comedy to begin with, but I really identify with this particular show. The premise is that this very hot black chef (Lenny Henry) (picture) is the head chef at England’s Finest French Restaurant. And his wife is the Manager and there is a young man named Everton who is perhaps the least competent kitchen worker in the history of all England. Chef is an extraordinary demanding man who is almost constantly ready to kill anyone who makes the slightest mistake in the kitchen. I know, it sounds a little odd. But if you've worked in a gourmet restaurant before, its so close to the truth that its scary. Trust me, this show is hilarious. Its mostly an interplay between Chef, his wife and Everton. Various other characters exist, but really, they're not important.

Lastly...
Newsradio Season 1 and 2 - I'm comfortable sharing the fact that I'm obsessed with this show. Mostly for the interplay between Dave Foley and Stephan Root. Many years ago, this show was on some channel between noon and 1pm. And I watched it everyday. It kept me going and gave me something small to look forward to each day. Everyday I spent an hour with Dave Foley, Stephan Root, Andy Dick, Phil Hartman, Joe Rogan, Vicki Lewis, and Maura Tierney. This silly little comedy gave me a little laughter at a time in my life when I needed some laughter. And now its out on DVD and by golly, I needed to have it. This show never fails to make me smile and remember a few important lessons and an important phone call. I like things that remind you of moments long gone. And, in the end, this show is hilarious.

Well, alright, that’s all for this shipment.

Till later all.

Jake Bullet

Sorry

I haven't updated in a long time. And I'm sorry for that, but it’s been an odd past few days. Anywho.

Jill and I may be playing sometime in the future, maybe. And I'm not going to be the bottom in that scene.

Work, in fact, sucks.

I bought Newsradio from Amazon.com. I also bought several other books and another movie but Newsradio is the important part. That show saved my life several years ago, literally. I'll tell that story one day.

The Perv Halloween party was loads of fun.

The Fairy and I got some new scalpels and needles over the weekend. I now have a box in my toybag devoted to needle play and cutting.

I had the cops crawling all over the building (security job) last night because there was a guy hiding in the building. We never found him. It was odd helping the cops search because they had guns drawn and I had a large flashlight.

I've sort of been in my head the last few days. It’s not fun.

My parents treat me like a 12 year old when in their house. Now under the right circumstances with someone other than my parents that could be fun and relaxing, but its just annoying when its them.

I have an idea for a series of interesting blog posts for the near future, more on that another day.

Alright well, hopefully we will soon return to regularly scheduled blog updates.

Jake Bullet

Work

Today my boss cried. Thats how bad work is. Paul, this expierenced player, sharp as a whip mind, totally not emotional guy, just cried today. Thats how bad work is. And guess who gets to be one of 4 people fixing it all? Thats right, me. How delightful. Work sucks.

I haven't had any time to blog till now, so stories will still have to wait as I am using the blog post partially as a way to take a break from work for a little while. And to be honest, I'm just not feeling in the mood to share tales of being cut over the weekend, it was a great weekend, but I'm just not up to it right now.

Also, updates to the blog....like new links and new other stuff, are also on hold for the time being.

Alright, well, I've procrastinated long enough, back to the grindstone. Fortunately I do get to go to the local pervert Halloween party tomorrow and I convinced Sally Jane to wear these really hot boots by offering to fetch drinks for her all night, that outta be fun.

Till then.

Jake Bullet

weekend

This is gonna be random, but have fun with it.

The ORIGINAL plan was to attend a party starting at 8pm in Chicago and leave the same night or at like 2am (technically) the next morning. 6 hour party plus drive time right. The ORIGINAL plan was just to eat a little, drink a little, shake a few hands, try not to do anything stupid and not scene. Easy enough. The ORIGINAL plan was a simple trip down south for a brief thank you party.

What actually happened was I was down in Chi Town from 3pm Friday till late afternoon of Sunday. What actually happened was I have several great new friends and great new stories. What actually happened was I had two great scenes and I have the prettiest marks to show off. What actually happened is I now have a standing invitation to come to Chi Town whenever I want.

So, here are some topics for the next few days.
-General recalling of the weekend
-A good HEAVY flogging scene
-My first cutting scene (he used a scalpel on me....)
-My new friends from Chi Town

Also, there are going to be some updates to the blog itself. New links, a syndication type thing into a livejournal blog, possibly a new look, updates to the cast of characters and my bio.

Unfortunately, Work and Life are going to be kicking my ass for the next few days. But hey, that's what you get sometimes. Till I have a little more time, I'll just leave you all with this little tease.

Jake Bullet

Marks...mmmmmm

I leaned over and smacked the alarm off this morning and then rolled onto my back. As I was still in that totally confused, still half asleep headspace, I gently brushed my arm across my chest, intending to rub the sleep out of my eyes. What I felt was a few tiny bits of pain as I rubbed over the burn marks from the flash cotton. I just grinned and remembered the panic that had been running through me as I burned. I moved my hand lower and felt how the right side of my stomach was covered with tiny stubble, rather than hair because it had all been burned off by alcohol. Again, I just smiled, remembering how I was so excited and scared as I let the Electrician burn me.

By this time, I was completely awake but I kept my eyes closed. Grinning to myself, I just let my hand explore my chest and discover various marks on my body from past few play sessions. Needle scratches that still feel different because, while closed up, they are still healing...though 90% of them are gone. Yellowish-brownish burn marks from flash cotton. Tiny red dots of electrical burns near my left nipple from some heavy electro play there. Most of the hair on the right side of my stomach just blackened stubble from the alcohol burns. Every time I found a mark with my fingers, I just gently traced that mark....remembering the scene, the feelings, the pain, the feeling of being small, the squirminess, the feeling of being someone’s if only for a short time, the emotions of it all. The scenes just came back to me. I loved it. And it was the perfect way to wake up. And the perfect time to talk about marks.

I remember that after the first scene I ever did, I was talking to the Top afterwards (who happens to be the munch leader) and discussing everything involved in the scene. One of the things she remarked is that because she was going light on me, the marks wouldn't last very long, maybe till the next afternoon. And we kept discussing marks, with me mostly nodding and asking open-ended questions to get more information. (Hey, that’s how I learned stuff, nodding a lot and asking questions) She told me that many submissives love having marks for days or even weeks at a time, which was a real surprise to me and even worried me a little. At the time, I couldn’t imagine A) playing hard enough to get marks which lasted that long or B) wanting to keep marks that long? What if I got hurt? What if I couldn’t play that hard? What if people saw them? What if my *parents* saw them? What if I had a scar from something? That’s what was running through my head back then.

Fast-forward about 18 months and its official. I love marks. I mean, I really really love marks.

I want to be marked so badly these days. I want to wear my marks with pride and show them off to the whole world. I want tell everyone (even the vanilla beans) about the person who loved me enough to leave me bruised, cut, red, bitten, scratched, or burned. Tell them about the person who left marks all over my body and how they did it.

To touch the makrs and look at them, remembering every detail. To thank a Dom for caring about me enough to leave there mark on me. To the idea of being able to thank someone with more than a handshake or a hug and kiss. ::blushing grin:: I LOVE marks and the idea of being marked.

Marks are something special. Its almost like my body is a canvas and scene/pain was a Domly type person painting me, but the marks, that’s the Doms signature on me. That’s the part that makes it artwork instead of just paint on canvas. I just can't explain how I feel about being marked. But looking at them while fresh and remembering who gave them to me and what it was like....well its special to me. I don' think I'm alone here either, I think alot of people like having marks. It’s like a little reminder. And in some ways, it’s almost a re-enforcement type thing. I'm not sure I'm explaining it right, but seeing the marks and the little jolts of pain they provide while fresh, well it reminds me of things. And not just of the scene, but it also reminds me that I'm a pervert. Reminds me that I enjoy suffering just because the person doing it gets off on my pain and submission. Reminds me that I earned the marks. Reminds me that I'm not a normal boy, but something....special, almost. Its just a good reminder of how while I pretend to be normal everyday, on the inside, I'm not. And I love the reminder.

After my needle play scene with the Piercer, in the days after, when the marks didn't hurt unless I touched them, I loved that whenever I had a free moment, I could just roughly rake my nails across my chest/stomach and feel the hurt come back, just for a few seconds. In the elevator, in my office if no one was around, in the halls if they were empty. Just 5 seconds to close my eyes, roughly rake my fingers around the scratches thru my shirt, to feel the pain again, the micro-endorphin rush from the pain, remembering the Piercers voice and the Fairy's teasing. I loved that until the marks healed too much to hurt anymore, but I can still look at them and remember.

I wish I could better explain why I love being marked, but I don't feel that I've done the topic justice. Its just one of those squirmy inside feelings that I can't seem to explain very well or really verbalize. I just know I love getting, feeling, seeing and having marks all over my body. I'm really a whore for marks.

But hey, I'm just one guy. What do y'all think?

Jake Bullet

Party and a Piercing

Its true, I'm a little nuts and a little bit of a slut. Okay, fine, I'm a complete slut.

This weekend, I got a new piercing and went to another BDSM party. I love my weekends.

The Fairy and I took a little road trip to see the Piercer, which was alot of fun. We got to chat alot, realized we had more in common than I first thought, got to chat about the local scene, and all sorts of other jazz. It was a bit of a long drive, but still lots of fun, lots and lots of fun. She also decided to start text messaging someone special during the little drive, but I didn't mind because I got to enjoy a phone call once we arrived at our destination. :) I got the upper cartiledge of my ear pierced, though for some reason, I was way more nervous than I thought I would be once we actually got to the Piercer's house. Something about the larger needles I think, plus the more medical like setup. I mean, its different when you are doing real body mod rather than a needle play scene. And even though I squirmed a little more than I should have then actually inserting the jewelry, it went it beautifully. Now I have to learn not to sleep on my left side for awhile. :)

The Fairy got her nips done which was fun to watch since I was the photographer for that little event. She is less of a fan of needles than I am so she had a little more trouble but took it like a champ. They also look quite nice.

Then there was the party on Saturday night. About 12 of us got together to tour a haunted house (leave it to the pervs to cheer when they say "you'll be punished if you misbehave in the haunted house") and then have dinner and a little play. The haunted house was fun and the long line gave us all a chance to chat and gossip a little. Then we all went to a house and had a little food. As usual, me being mouthy was less than a good idea. Just for the record, bad time to get a case of the giggles is when you're supposed to be saying "I'm sorry Sir". Then the Electrician and I played. I was hoping to work Sally Jane in a little more as she is a huge fireplay fan. She did light my arm up, but with the crowd, she just wasn't in the mood to play. The Electrician tied me down to a table and then did some moderate to heavy electro-play plus fire play.

Now, I was joking that this was like dinner and a show, with me as the show, because some people were still finishing dinner. And the idea of me being a show for people made me kind of hot. I really am a total slut. Anyway, I was shocked, alot, with the violet wand and also had flashcotton and alcohol put on my chest and lit on fire. It was a fun intense scene, though the audience was a little more into playful heckling than usual and it took me a little longer to drop into space. One fun thing was having about 6 people running there hands over my body, shocking me when I had the violet wand current running up through my body into there fingers. I still have fun little burn marks and I lost quite a bit of hair on my chest. Not that it was furry to begin with, but still, alot is gone now. And I am now totally positive that I love marks that last. They are fun to touch and look at and remember.

I have also decided that electro play is much more fun when my pink bits aren't involved. I mean, getting zapped with a nasty bulb right on the head of your dick just hurts, alot, and not in the fun way. I was trying to crawl off the table after one shock and begging the Electrician not to shock there again. But again, it was a fabulous scene.

Alright, well, I should be doing my post on marks soon enough. Hopefully tonight or tomorrow. Till then...

Jake Bullet

Things you learn

The post on BDSM making one feel pretty will wait till tomorrow. Here are a few random observations from the past 24 hours.

-An 8 minute and 45 second phone call can totally make my day and can make me blush and squirm in public.

-Women don't *need* BDSM toys. There teeth and nails are mooooooore than enough to cause plenty of pain and little marks. Silly Fairy.

-When Sally Jane decides to pinch someone for being mouthy or something, I am, in fact, the only one who stays still and lets her do it even though it hurts alot. I mean, what am I supposed to do? She says "Stay still".

-It is possible for Andrew to spend over half his workday trying to rearrange the office.

-Boxer-briefs look cuter than boxers, but also feel different.

Randomness is fun. Tomorrow will be a real post.

Jake Bullet

If only I had a doggie treat...

So I was at the security job around half past midnight when I heard a knock on the front glass doors. Now, we are not allowed to let people into the building after midnight so I knew that all I was going to do was tell whomever was at the door that they couldn't come in (unless of course they had a legitimate emergency like a gushing flesh wound). An annoying task because often people only want to use our phone or ATM, but I don't make the rules.

So I walked over to the door and saw this very pretty little girl. Maybe 5 foot tell, but probably not even that, look like not a day over 21 and had a very submissive look to her. I don't know why she looked particularly submissive, but she did. It wasn't that she was a girl, or her height, or even that she was blond. She just had this look....this look like she really should be coming to munches and exploring her inner submissive. But I digress.

If it were up to me, I would let her in but it's not up to me. So I carefully explained that she couldn't come in and we had a little back and forth discussion about it because she did really want to come into the building. Well, she was intent on staying in our vestibule and arguing so I turned and started to walk away. But as I did, she dropped down to her hands and knees and sat like a puppy would sit and started really really begging me. Down on her knees, her little ass rest on her calf muscles and her hands in front of her, holding the rest of her body up. Honestly, she looked just like a little puppy. I just stood there and stare for a minute or so, trying not to think of horrible, terrible things I wanted to do to her at that point and then walked away before my....interest.... in her became evident.

I couldn't get her out of my mind the rest of then night, because she just looked so cute in that pose.....in fact she actually started scratching at the door just before I walked away. Just looked like a little puppy and images of puppy play danced through my head for quite awhile. And so, I have decided to start keeping cookies in my pocket at work.....just in case a situation like this ever arises again.

I wonder, would she have let me balance a little cookie on her nose and then eaten it on command?? I wonder.....

Jake Bullet

Kinky Kollege III....Piercing

Okay, the post that I'm sure at least a few of you have been waiting. I got to play with the Piercer and the Fairy on Saturday night of Kinky Kollege. Here is the report with the details I feel comfortable sharing with y'all.

The Piercer is the same guy from the nearly fainting episode and we've seen each other several times since last February. One thing about the Piercer is that he isn't a Dom, he isn't a Master, he's a Sadist through and through. He just enjoys causing pain and is really good at it. He's a really great guy, dedicated to his art, easy to chat with and very handsome. He is also quite straight and doesn't often Top boys. But we know each other a little and he liked the idea of us playing.

I wasn't exactly sure what I wanted except that I knew no medical play and I wanted it to look pretty and I wanted to be covered in needles. The Piercer suggested we do a little remake of Gulliver's Travels....basically, he was going to use needles plus colored string to tie me down to a bondage table and then have his way with me. It sounded like fun to me and sounded like it would be easy enough to take so I quickly agreed. The Fairy and I helped set up his gear and I nervously stripped down to a pair of tight black boxers. After double checking what we were both expecting and checking safewords and all that jazz, I laid down on the table and had a few minutes to relax (i.e. get myself all worked up and nervous) before he started.

The Piercer, after working the Fairy a little to fuck with my head, started on my left arm, putting 4 22gauge needles into my arm. Two in the upper arm, two in the lower. He then put 4 in the other arm and then 3 into each of my legs. After a short time, the needles started feeling warm and floaty and really nice. Don't get me wrong, they hurt going in, but they felt nice after awhile. The Piercer then started using hobby twine to tie the needles to the table, which illicted "cute little moans and whimpers" as the Fairy put it. Because he looped the hobby twine in a figure 8 pattern around the needles, it pulled them away from the skin so there was a constant tug on the needles even before they were tied to the table.

Well, the combination of being in only boxers plus, the needles, plus the Fairy teasing me caused a swelling in my boxers. Which is to say I had a monstrous hardon. What really helped was the Fairy plus several other ladies commenting on it as I lay there, my cock twitching and waving. Yeah, having hot women comment on my dick as a handsome man jammed me with needles....yeah, there was no way that I wasn't going to get hard from that. The best part was as the Fairy and another woman were commenting on how "it looks like a dogs tail waving". Embarrassing? yes, quite, but still hot.

Once the Piercer had preped more needles, he began working on my chest. Now those needles hurt. Hurt alot. At one point I screamed, "Put down the fucking biopsy punch". There was much yelling, cursing, promises (threats) of retribution, whimpering, moaning, groaning, and squealing going on while the Piercer put 34 needles in my chest. Yes 34 needles in 4 rows up and down. The Fairy's job at that point was pretty much to tease and torment me, because, well, she's good at that and it seemed to be working for all 3 of us. I can't even count the number of times I swore that I would get her back the moment I could, you know, move and stuff. She just giggled. I suppose its difficult to be very threatening when tied to a table with fluorescent green string.

After counting up the needles, the Piercer noticed that we were only 2 needles short of 50 and asked me how I left about putting the last two into my dick. And, I just wasn't prepared for that. I've never really done any sort of CBT (unless drunken sac tag counts) and that idea was a little too scary for me. Because he wasn't sure if I was begging him not to and meaning "please do that" of if I really didn't want to he said he was putting them in unless I said red to that. I didn't even let him pause, the word red was out of my mouth almost as soon as he had finished saying it. That gave the Piercer and the Fairy a little laugh and so he opted to put the last 2 in my left nipple. Those hurt a little. Those two had me cursing and promising to exact revenge.. They hurt alot to be quite honest.

The Piercer let me relax and I managed to get my head up enough to take a good look at my chest. And I was blown away. I was covered in needles. Just freaking covered and that freaked me out in a good way. The Fairy took the opportunity to tease me and it was at this point that she convinced me that she had made a sign on the table that read "Gulliver". Now, of course there was no sign, but with the Fairy, the Piercer and several audience members telling me there was, I was firmly convinced. And I was ready to beat the Fairy senseless because she's a brat. So I started trying to untie the strings holding me down. And had absolutely no luck. I had to rotate my arm so far to get at the knots that they were pulling way too hard for comfort on the needles in my arms.

Now it was time to take the needles out. Okay, the scenes nearly over I tell myself. Well done. Fat Fucking Chance. See, it would be wayyyyyyy too easy for the Piercer to simply pull the needles out at drop them in a sharps container. Ha Ha! Why do that when instead you can slowly pull each needle out one by one and then use the very sharp tips to scratch the crap out of my chest. And that what he did. Ya know those airplane and car noises you make with small children to try to get them to eat something. Well as he was pulling the needles out, he decided to play a little race car like game with two of them. Racing all over my chest, dodging other needles, scratching quite deeply and also making 5 year old car noises. That freaked the shit out of me. A man who was acting like a 5 year old playing race car games on my chest with sharp needles? Oh yeah, that’s the makings of a relaxing time. The fairy has since told me "The look of horror on your face was priceless". My chest, by the time most of the needles came out was cover from waist to neck in needle scratches, deeply painful needle scratches. And of course I took this all very stoically. That is if we define stoically as whimpering, nearly crying, moaning and begging. Yeah. The last two in the nip got alot of play before they very painfully came out.

After that the arm and leg needles were quickly removed and I just lay there, totally out of it, off in my own little world, trying to work up the courage to try to move my arms and legs. I got a good look at my chest at this point and the scratches were everywhere. And there was blood all over my chest. Very hot. I was trying to bring myself back to something approaching normalcy when the Piercer said we had one thing left. He soaked a few paper towel in 70% isopropyl alcohol and then started wiping my chest down. Ever put alcohol in an open wound? It hurts. So you can imagine how it felt on all the pretty little needles holes and scratches. Apparently my friends could hear me from across the room at that point.

Well, the Piercer helped me put my shirt back on and he and the Fairy provided some very nice aftercare and I began to work on figuring out how to use my legs and arms again. After having some glucose (I HIGHLY recommend glucose tablets) and relaxing for awhile, I started to get dressed again and met up with a few friends and I was eager to take my shirt off and show off my marks. I was warmed by the Piercer that I either needed to keep my shirt on the rest of the night or go take a hot shower and very carefully wash out the scrapes and needle marks. So, the Fairy helped me up to the room, because I still hadn't fully regained my motor skills and I took a very hot shower. Which also hurt, the hot water and soap really make the little marks burn and sting, but, like the whore I am, I liked it.. Plus, I had the opportunity to look at all of the pretty marks all over my body, to touch and feel them and to just grin like an idiot. I got dressed again and headed back to the party, eager to show off my marks, to see other people play and to thank the Piercer for the scene. All in all it was very fun and very physically taxing. And it makes me want to play with needles alot.

So that how everything went, I was on cloud nine for the rest of the night and I still have little scratch marks on my body, although they are mostly healed. The Piercer and I have traded some e-mails and are already planning to play again sometime. Again, I think its official, I like needles. And, writing about this makes me want to write a post on how BDSM makes me feel pretty. Alright, well, hope y'all enjoyed.

Jake Bullet

Kinky Kollege Debrief Part II

Kinky Kollege. Kinky, kinky, kinky kollege.

Well, if I had to describe the event in one word it would be "wow". I was blown away. Every little detail that didn't go so well at there last event, every misstep, every error was fixed. It was a perfect event, just absolutely perfect. The classes were great, the social events and areas were great, the dungeon was fucking fabulous and the people were wonderful. The vendors had so many cool items and so many things I want to buy and touch and feel. I cannot recommend this event any more strongly.

Now, shopping. Shopping is a hobby for me.....one I enjoy greatly. And I made 4 lovely purchases. And was close to making several more. The first thing I got was a copy of SM101 by Jay Wiseman. I'll talk more about that purchase and meeting him and helping him a little later....probably in another post.

I got a convention shirt and also a shirt which says "Sex & Politics" on the front from the NCSF. More on the NCSF at a later date.

Now my favorite purchase, which I am wearing right now. I was chatting with a girl from the munch and spent a fair bit of the weekend flirting with her. Well the Fairy as I'll call her and I were looking for a new leather skirt for dungeon time. She already had a lovely corset to go with it and I was providing so tasteful advice on whether leather shirt to get. While looking, we also saw men's leather pants. I grabbed some pants at her insistence and we decided to share a changing room and watch each other change and then see how the outfits looked. The first pair of leather pants was a little too tight, so I traded up and tried them on and they were perfect. Pretty, shiny, beautiful leather just covered in leather smell. I had to get them. The fairy also got one of the shirts that I helped to suggest. So I am now the proud owner of LEATHER PANTS. And for certain readers, I'll be more than happy to model them for y'all.

Anyway, time to go send several e-mails, make some posts and relax a little.

Jake Bullet

Back from Kinky Kollege

Late last night I got back from Kinky Kollege. And what an event it was. Seeing old friends, making new ones, getting to know people from the local munch better, classes, play time, and everything rocked. It was freaking fabulous. I can't describe it all in one blog entry and I'm still recovering so I'll tease you all with a list of topics which WILL be covered.

-Playing with the Piercer (an etra tease for y'all....Its been 48 hours since he and I played and I still have marks)
-Meeting Jay Wiseman
-Shopping!
-The new girl
-Classes
-Volunteering and afterwards
-Meeting fun people

I will say this, the emotional letdown after the event was almost as bad as after Shibaricon. I mean, doing nothing but BDSM related stuff for 3 days and then having to go back to the real world is a total downer for me. It sucks to have to quietly talk about things. It sucks that I can't share my weekend with my coworkers and friends. It sucks that sexy T-shirts and nudity aren't appropriate dress anymore. Its just frustrating to know that I had a few days to be completely in my element around like minded people and now its time to go back to hiding and back to having to lie about what I do. I was better prepared for the letdown this time, but it still doesn't mean the letdown doesn't suck.

Alright, well, time to put away new toys and clothes and then grab some sleep.

Jake Bullet

Preping for the event

Well, its close to 4am, I'm waking up in 5 hours and I'm waiting for my laundry to get done. Why do laudry at 4am? Well, when you have to wash all your cute outfits for an event this weekend and you get home at 2am, there really isn't a choice.

This weekend is Kinky Kollege and man do I need it.

Class, work, other work, and life have just been hell these last few weeks. I feel like I haven't been able to relax at all lately and so I am really looking forward to it.

The Poet and I leave early Friday morning and will be gone till late on Sunday. Tomorrow I'm getting a haircut and my eyebrows done so I look cute, I have enough clothes ready to go to leave town for a week, my toy bag is packed(including the gnome), I did a little "manscaping" earlier today and so I am very close to being ready to go.

Hopefully a few other people from the munch will be there as well and it should be a ton of fun.

Anyway, I just heard the little bell ring so time to change loads and then get some sleeeeeeeeeeep.

Oh and before I forget, check out Siren's latest entry. I dream of the day when I have a connection like that with someone. Siren and Raven are just about two of the coolest people I know. :)

I promise I'll post again tomorrow before I leave and I am sure there will be many great stories of the weekend.

Jake Bullet

Randomness

Ahhh, Friday nights working stupid security...wonderous I tell you. Wonderous in the same way that being stuck in a phone booth with an angry walrus is wonderous. (Note: hey, if you think coming up with metaphors this good is easy, then you try)

Some Thursdays are almost nothing but BDSM talk in one way or another, the group will have 12 different conversations running all over the bar about BDSM, sex, scenes and fun parties. People drift from one conversation to another, atleast one pairing of people is covertly, but at the same time obviously flirting and planning a night of wild sexy business. Poeple talk about toys, tease one another and groping is occasionally involved. Other days its like this past Thursday.

For no particular reason, things generally seem slightly muted. People aren't as spread out physcially around the bar and the conversations are about more mundane things. Jack, Jill, Andrew and I spent most of the evening saying silly things, discussing West Wing, retelling Lewis Black jokes or just chewing the fat. Quite enjoyable, in a slow, glowy sort of way. Just not quite as much fun as discussions of sex, followed by more discussions of sex.

I think the quite nights are like slowly enjoying a good bottle of wine. Many nights are like doing shots of tequilla and body shots, trying to remember whose turn it is to buy the next round. Both are good at different times, both are quite delicious, but they are different.

I wish I could go to sleep right now, but I can't. So, I'm going to do the next best thing, listen to the radio and veg out.

Peace y'all.

Jake Bullet

Sick as a dog

Well, I've been sick as a dog since about Sunday. It made me glad to have hair and fingernails.....if for no other reason then fingernails and hair cannot feel aches and pain.

And my entire weekend before Sunday was, well.....imagine for a second a BDSM scene involving having a cheese grater vigorously rubbed against your entire body. No, my weekend wasn't that bad.

Imagine that the cheese grater was very rusty and covered in Tabasco and ginger root.....my weekend wasn't that bad.

Imagine the cheese grater thing, plus being repeatedly kicked in the nuts with steel toe boots (no, I'm not some huge CBT masochist), plus having the unholy love child of Fran Dresher and Carrot Top being the one topping the scene. And this unholy love child is especially sadistic and knows the pain that their laughter and jokes cause the world. Well, okay, it wasn't quite that bad.

Imagine the nut kicking, cheese grater on body thing, the Carrot Top/Fran Dresher devil child topping you and then add in a large vibrating butt plug made of rusty steel wool. That’s how bad my weekend was. And then I got sick.

I'm feeling much better now. But several hours ago, I was sick as a dog. And so I had the bright idea to search through the boxes in my room, hoping to find drugs. And I found some lovely ones. Whoever invented painkillers and decongestant deserves some sort of award. In the search through boxes, I also managed to clean my room somewhat. Which is a good thing. Right now I've gotten most everything put away and put in the right place. So atleast something good came of the sickness......the plague as I like to call it.

One funny thing from the weekend. There was bowling and drinking involved and many trips to the bar. Now the bartender looked more than a little crazy and I was sort of fine with that, given that we were in a bowling alley. But, I must have made 6 or 7 trips to this bartender, getting my own drinks and drinks for others, getting beer nuts and getting bowling shoes. Well every time I went up there he'd say something to the effect of "hey Jim!!" (Note: Jim is not my real name nor is it a nickname I've ever gone by). After the third time we have a little something that went like this:

Crazy Bar Guy (CBG): Hey There Jim, ya need a refill?
Jake Bullet: [long pause].....hey....[longer pause]....Steve?... yeah another Miller Lite.
CBG: Coming right up Jim!

I figured if he was going to name me Jim, I was gonna call him Steve. Neither of us ever called the other one out on it. The problem with it is now Andrew keeps walking up to me and going "Heyyyyy..................Steve?" then he laughs. Silly Andrew.

So, yes, ignoring the weekend of hell, lets turn our attention to last Thursday. A most enjoy able Thursday. First off, the Toymaker had deliveries for me. One of which I desperately regret ordering. First toy is a rabbit flogger, like the one from the mean mindfuck. I like this one, its cute, its fuzzy, its furry, its simply Jim dandy. Then there is the evil toy. The evil horrid nasty toy. The mean evil nasty horrible toy.

I ordered a paddle shaped like a hairbrush. But that wasn't enough. So I ordered it to be a half inch thick. But that wasn't enough, so I asked for the wood to be oak instead of nice soft pine or aspen. Let me paint a picture. Jake Bullet, red assed, shaking, panicking, and maybe even crying a little as some mean, delightfully evil, Domly person comes at him with a Half inch thick, oak hairbrush shaped paddle. I'm just going to cry. It hurts my hand just testing it. Why, oh why do I feel the compulsion to buy things which hurt me?

Well, then there was Jill and I chatting part of the night away. And by chatting I mean, we talked while I fondled her. Why? Because secretly I like Jill a bit and I think she’s cute. So while we were chatting she had her legs in my lap and I started rubbing them. I mean what else is a boy to do when presented with legs in his lap? Sheesh. However, it was at the point that I had moved up the legs and was gently massaging Jill's....um, happy place... while the two of us were chatting with her boyfriend, that’s the point at which it might have been a little naughty.

Later in the night I had Jill in my lap and decided to just reach under her shirt, move annoying undergarments and fondle her breasts. Jacks reaction??

He shrugs and says, "Meh, I'm going home with her so have fun". So I proceeded to fondle and pinch and caresses her for a fair portion of the night. God I love Thursdays.

Then came an impromptu conversation Sally Jane and I had about our play session from the other weekend. It was definitely an intriguing conversation and I think we both walked away with a much better picture of the other and where we both are coming from. In an e-mail I got from her later, she said she was intrigued by me and that she looks forward to continuing the conversation. I like being impressive and I like being intriguing. I have absolutely no idea where this will go, but I'm jazzed by the prospects of breaking some assumptions that people have about me and by the possibilities.

Alright, time to lay down and then time to work on the secret, crazy, insane project and then clean the room a little bit more.

Jake Bullet

D/s versus S&M

::blushing furiously and squirming around at Siren's comment, quietly taking the penny you gave me into my pocket::

Yes Siren I'm sure that you do have a delightful little store in mind. Not that the idea of going to that store with you and pushing my comfort level simultaneously scares the shit out of me and excites me or anything.

Well, alright, I have a little more time tonight and I want to expand on the comment I made yesterday. Yesterday I said:

First idea, I am more okay with my like of S&M than I am with D/s. D/s type things are still scary and all that and still occasionally have me saying "Am I really doing this?". I still really really like the concept of D/s and want to do it, but I'm less sure of my footing there.

I wanted to clarify this and expand a little bit. The short explanation for that comment is that the notion of really doing real time D/s scares me because I've never had a chance to really do it. What I mean by that is that I have done enough S&M scenes that I'm relatively accepting of those activities, while I've never had the privledge of being in a real time, real life official D/s relationship. And that makes D/s new to me.

Now this may come as a shock to some of you, but new things scare me....alot. My first munch, play party, convention and scene were all deeply frightening and a little bit unnerving for me. Things which are new are hard for me, they're a definite challenge and they are difficult for me.

The other reason why D/s scares me and why I am a little less sure of myself is the commitment it takes. One can have a good S&M scene with a few minutes of negotiation and a free hour or two. After the scene is finished (and the wonderful aftercare has been taken care of) two people can part ways, each happy with the scene without much follow up. (Side note: Obviously I encourage more negotiation, longer scenes and talking afterwards whenever possible.) D/s though isn't like that. Its different.

You can't negotiate a real D/s relationship in a few minutes or even in a few days time. Its something huge, something super important, something that should be deeply meaningful and special. There's weeks and months of constant on-going negotiation, subtle give and take, minor adjustments, screwups and great moments. Plus its requires an ongoing commitment. You can say to your partner, if its just S&M, "well hey, I just don't feel like being beaten today". In a D/s relationship, you can still try to say that, but in the end, if your partner snaps and points at the ground, you're still expected to be on your knees and obedient. Its that 24/7 thing. The using titles even when standing in line together at the bank. The "constantness" of it. The specialness of it. The really submitting to someone and there rules and expectations and desires.

Those things that scare me. But at the same time, I'd sell my right foot on eBay for the chance to do it with the right person. Hell, I'd sell my body to science for the opportunity to do it.

I intended for this to be a little more coherent and put together, but alas, my brain simply isn't working very well right now. And Its time for little boys to sleep. So alas, I must be off.

Jake Bullet

Quoted!

Well, the SpankingBlog has once again quoted me, which is very nice indeed. Its nice to know the people read my stuff and care about what I think. I mean, I know I have blog fans and regular readers, but its always nice for a more famous blog to quote you.

SpankBoss quoted a short little section from yesterday where I remarked that I am officially a pervert and that I'm surprisingly okay with it. And that has given me two new topic ideas.

First idea, I am more okay with my like of S&M than I am with D/s. D/s type things are still scary and all that and still occasionally have me saying "Am I really doing this?". I still really really like the concept of D/s and want to do it, but I'm less sure of my footing there.

Second idea, my acceptance of my strange desires has come slowly with a few leaps forward. Sort of a steady progress, with the occasional blind flash of insight.

I'll be exploring these topics and many more in the coming days.

Alright, well I am sore, sweaty, tired and in need of a shower. I just helped Andrew move and so its into the shower with me and then beddy bye.

Lata all.

Jake Bullet

A mean mindfuck

Shortish update on the life of Jake Bullet.

In the past 3 days, I have made BDSM related purchases every day.

On Saturday, The toymaker had a neat little toy he called "Mini-Me". Its a sturdy handle with a medium sized square of heavy leather attached to it. Its stings a great deal, makes a pretty noise and it looks innocent. Looks innocent but is actually mean as hell. I like this new toy. One day, I'm sure I'll hate it, but right now I like it alot.

On Sunday, I decided to finally go out and get a number of non-kinky, but necessary items to keep in my bag. I've now got a sharps container, a full first aid kit, a bottle of glucose tablets (they're just great to help you recover from an intense scene), and latex gloves (safe sex and needle play). Nothing too kinky, but good stuff to have none the less. I also took the opportunity to clean out and organize my toy bag. All the safety stuff is in one section. Various personal sex items (dildos and plugs) are in the other section. The middle is reserved for my rope, floggers and other toys. Good times.

Today, the Poet got me a cutting board which will make a delightful paddle. And I picked myself up a wooden spoon. But no ordinary wooden spoon. This is as hefty as many paddles I've seen. I'm sure some perverted spanking fan designed it knowing that it would rarely be used on food and frequently used on hot sore bottoms. It is slightly curved so it hugs my ass perfectly. I like that spoon.

I think its official. I am a dirty pervert. Oh well, I kind of like it. Moving along.

The Mindfuck? Well good story there. I'll keep it short. There was another party this weekend and I was invited (I feel so cool to get the invites to these parties). And Sally Jane was there. Sally Jane is a new Domme in the area who is unpartnered. She is good friends with the Toymaker and is considered a very heavy player. She just really hits hard and the Toymaker says "She's not fit to play with normal people". Well, I happen to think that Sally Jane is akind of cute and even though I'm not looking for a relationship with her, I wanted to play. So we played and the Toymaker helped her make sure I wasn't being pushed too hard. Well because I was "peaking" I got blindfolded midway through which I thought was very mean. Okay secretly I liked it a little but still.

Anyways, they two of them take out the nasty sounding toy I've ever heard. It makes the heavy bottoms cringe and so its wayyyyy too heavy for me. I'm new, I need to work up to that level. But they take it out and start swishing it (its a particularity evil cane) and talking to themselves like I'm not in the room.

Sally Jane: Do you think he can take this one?
Toymaker: Well we can always mop up the blood.
Sally Jane: Good point.

And thats only a snippet of the conversation. So I was a little freaked out. And then I felt the can very very gently tapping my ass and I heard Sally Jane ask if I was ready. I replied with a very shaky and scared "kinda". And then I felt it move away. I heard the characteristic swish of the cane and I tensed up, waiting for an unbelievable line of pain on my ass.

Instead I felt a very soft, furry rabbit skin flogger gently thud onto my ass. I half screamed and then (without thinking) just said "oh man, oh, fuck you, oh god, that was mean".

A tip for any new kids. When you say "fuck you" to a Domme, they tend to use that as a good reason to be extra mean. And they don't like it very much.

But it was all good. A very nice mindfuck and a good scene. She wasn't really upset at all about me using bad words, she just teased me about it later.

I'd write more, but I want to get a little shut eye.

Jake Bullet

easy shift

Well, i just punched out of work and it was the easiest shift ever. Why? Well, I spent pretty much the entire evening working on the story I alluded to yesterday. The story makes me squirmy just writing it.

And today the prof who teaches my two monday classes is out of town so I have the day off. So I'll be back in a few hours to write here.

Well, time to get some sleep. More posting will be had this afternoon.

Jake Bullet

Topics to cover

In the coming days we'll be exploring the following topics:

Recent play parties
love/hate relationships in BDSM
BDSM and body image
and random life musing.

I'm also working on another perverted story which may or may not make it here. It may be for private consumption only. Who knows.

I've also completed moving. Now I just have to get the new place set up.
School is going nicely.
I'm generally a happy boy right now. Okay, more later tonight and in the coming days.

Jake Bullet

An unexpected 3:30am update

So, I had just fallen asleep... I was just in that half asleep half awake zone when a ringing starts coming from my desk. And I wander over to start pounding on my alarm clock and noticed it was actually my phone. And it was Siren on the other end. And we got to chat for about 3 fabulous hours. Which was great. And I managed to go from groggy to completely and totally awake in the span of about 11 nanoseconds when I heard her.

I got to tell her all about the last play party. We got to discuss all kinds of things and catch up. We got to share funny stories and talk about random little things in our lives. She got to be delightfully evil and make me blush and squirm and get butterflies in my stomach. We got to chat about things which would make me whine and beg and plead but that secretly excite me. Much fun was had by all. Much catching up and teasing was accomplished.

Unfortunately, the Goddess' of phone technology decided to spoil the phone call midway through by disrupting the call. And what was really great about that was right after I asked about another crazy idea I had, and right after Siren said that it was something that could be looked into....thats when the phone died. So I'm pretty much going to be nonstop thinking about that little possibility for the next few days. A possibility which is simultaneously scary and exciting.

Anywho, I need to actually get some sleep, because I have class tomorrow. But rest assured, you shall all hear fabulous tales of play parties and the other wonders of my life. Ta ta folks.

Jake Bullet

Playtime

Hey folks,

Yeah, so we're going to have to hold off on that description of the BDSM play party for a few reasons. First, I have to figure out which details I'm okay with sharing in this blog and which ones will be kept secret. Second, I have to actually write what happened and that's gonna take awhile. Third, I want to tell some people what happened before telling the whole world. So the description will have to wait. And it will be broken into several posts. As a consolation prize, here is another teaser

I had two fabo scenes. One very nice one with the electrician which involved a TENS unit, a mercury switch and LOTS of tickling. I'm secretly very ticklish.

The second scene was with Alice. A very nice Domme who loves to beat me. It was really, really intense for me and took alot out of me. There was grunting and cursing involved. And everyone clapped after we were through. That was good rough times.

Then I made the mistake of setting my shoes on Alice's kitchen table which earned me a little punishment. I real fast learned that punishment hurts, but not in the happy fun way. But guess what, I will never as long as I love set my shoes anywhere in her house but on the floor. Ever. I make alot of mistakes but usually I learn fairly fast.

Oh yeah, and Paul got me a lawn gnome. An unstolen lawn gnome, but that's another story. Well, time to work on an e-mail and then get some sleep. I have early class tomorrow.

Jake Bullet

PS. Keep the comments coming. I greatly enjoy them.

Playtime teaser

Yesterday I was at a private play party all day with the Poet. Much fun was had by all.

I can assure you that there will be lots of fun and fabulous stories tomorrow and maybe later tonight. But for now, I need to go socialize with the family. I promise regular posting will resume shortly....like later tonight.

Jake Bullet

Update Number 4375

::taking a cue from Siren and blowing all the dust off my blog::

Oh you wonderfully readers, well I'm glad you're still reading, that's always good to have. Here's how my like is going.

I have been officially reprimanded for the security job thingy. Basically, there is a letter in my jacket permanently and I got scolded. Which hella sucked.

Life has been kicking my ass lately. The things currently on my to do list are:
-finish setting up class schedule
-pay tuition
-Move to the new apartment by Wednesday night. (its slightly bigger, has a balcony, come with AC and a comfy chair so its cool I guess)
-Write 2 speeches for Paul
-Write up 3 letters for Paul
-Write up a plan for the secret crazy project
-Set up meetings with about 7 different people
-Write an article for the school newspaper by Thursday
-Go home and see the folks and deal with some stuff with them
-Staff a security event
-Staff Paul for the next few days because of all the events he has to be at
-And several other minor projects.

I want to be able to delegate some of this stuff away, or do it later, or just not do it at all. But I can't. I promised people I'd do these things and I promised myself I would do my best to do them. So I am basically not going to sleep tonight and spend the night writing speech's, letters and plans. And tomorrow I have to start moving. Hopefully in about a week, things will calm down a little more.

The meeting the other day, well I'm not sure how it went. I went in and laid down the law and kept trying to push this woman slightly off balance so I could get a real reaction. What I got what was lots of nodding and "well, I understand that's how you feel but...". Apparently that's how she trys to disarm people and also she uses subtle tactics like avoiding scheduling meetings and taking you onto mindless tangents to avoid actually listening to you and fixing things. Its not how I feel either. I have documented proof from multiple sources. I can absolutely guarantee you that I'm right. She is a very annoying person to deal with. But I still have confidence that I can win. And I like winning more than almost anything. So I'll be keeping y'all up to speed on that.

Other than that, I've just been hanging around. Spent much of the day watching CNN and worrying. Because I am a chronic worrier. I worry about people I care about. I worry about myself, if I'm doing a good enough job. I worry if I make people happy. I worry about most everything. I'm not sure if its a good or bad quality. Anyway.

Anyway, I'm at work right now and just got called into Pauls office. So I guess I've got to go. I'll try to get back to more regular posting.

Jake Bullet

PS. I've got two "parties" to go to in the next few weeks and to be honest, I'm really looking forward to gettting my ass beat.

pissed off

I am so pissed at myself right now.

I'm not going into the details right now of what happened. In a few days, when i know for sure what actually happened, I'll share what details I feel comfortable with. And for a few of you (you can guess who you are) I'll be sharing the whole thing. The very very short version of the story is there was an incident at the security job on Friday. I've been placed on unpaid administrative leave for the next 2 days while they finish the investigation. And when I say they, I mean Andrew, his assistant, and Andrews boss. Plus the police. Yeah.

And even though it wasn't my fault, I feel like it is my fault and responsibility. And I should have fixed it. And so now atleast 4 people will be wasting the next 3 days figuring out what happened because *I* fucked up. And it pisses me off that I fucked up and now I look like an ass and Andrew looks like a bad boss and I feel like shit. And I'm really pissed at myself.

In other news, today I once again proved that I don't play softball when it comes to the other job. I needed to set up a meeting with an incompetent windbag to explain exactly why what they're doing is unacceptable to us and why/how they are going to change. I called trying to set up a 45 minute meeting for Wednesday afternoon. I was told she is all booked up and only has 15 minute openings till late next week. She is famous for avoiding meetings with people like me. So I hung up, drove over there, marched into her office and managed to get 45 minutes on Wednesday morning. And I didn't have to tell her what the meeting was about; she gets to hear that surprise on Wednesday.

This woman is about to abruptly learn that I don't play around and that her shit isn't going to fly anymore. Going into that room as pissed as I was probably not the worlds brightest idea, but I got what I wanted. And mark my words, when I win, when I beat her, when she realizes I'm right and she's wrong and she does what I say.....I am going to dance. I am going to win and then get drunk and dance. Becuase thats how I roll.

I may be submissive, I may be a whore, I may be meek when I'm engaging in BDSM, I may like being someone's little pet and I may enjoy being dominted. But, at my job, I'm king and I lay down the law. And I'm always right. And I always win. And I don't play softball. I start with the 90 mile per hour pitches and I don't start by being very nice either. I get what I want because I am better than the people who don't do what I want. And I ALWAYS win. Thats why I get paid the big bucks.

Now, I'm going to get drunk and go to sleep. Good bye.

Jake Bullet

This building is trying to kill me

Well, we're skipping the promised topic and moving right into something else. 3 quick updates, then I'll tell you why you never want a security job.

First, going to a perverted picnic later today. Good times likely will be had by all. The Poet will be there as well as possibly Andrew and many munch regulars. Hoepfully I'll be able to chat with people about a few things that have lately been on my mind.

Second, I got to talk to Siren again today. I'm very jazzed about that since i enjoy talking to her so much. Our respective free times haven't seemed to match up as much lately, so I was really jazzed when we got to talk for awhile. It's weird, but my day suddenly got brighter when we started talking. Okay, maybe thats not weird, maybe its normal. But to me its new, and secretly I kind of like it.

Third. Thanks to Agony Aunty and the Pink Bottomed Girls for there links to me. I'm always jazzed when people decide they like what I write enough to link to it. So thanks so much, I really like both of these sites and encourage y'all to read them both. Also, if anyone else has linked to me and I haven't noticed it, let me know and I'll be sure to thank you.

Okay. Never get a security job. Ever. For any reason. Today my partner decided to call into work sick about 3 minutes before the shift started. And no one I called wanted to come in. Not that I blame them., it was a saturday night afterall. Anyway, I was already planning on bringing Paul over to hang out, talk and generally cause mischief. Well, he only stayed for about an hour and after that was when the day started to suck.

First, everything takes twice as long because I don't have a partner to do half of it. But thats not the bad part.

The bad part would have been the fact that all the lights in the scary part of the building are broken. Yes, all the lights, its a problem with the panel. And so i had the joy of walking many many times thru there armed with nothing more than a small flashlight and a wiffle bat That sucked but it wasn't the bad part.

The bad part was when I started hearing noises coming out of one of the very few rooms I don't have keys for. Noise that sounded like a machine was going to explode or break or catch fire. Very loud and terrible noises. I spent over an hour trying to break into that room and figure out what it was, with no luck. The cameras showed it was totally clear and I must have tried every key we had on the locks. So that was an hour of my night, plus another hour checking every nearby room and checking the outside of the building to try to find the noise. I never found it and it sort of spontaniously stopped after awhile.

Plus there was the usual dose of random scary noises and creepy feelings up the back of my neck. Except this time, there is no one to call to have them come chekc it out with me.

Plus, the idiots in charge of closing the building did a piss poor job and over a dozen doors were unlocked. Why don't we just hang a sign out that says "Hey murders and sickos, Jake Bullet's in here alone and he's fair game tonight"? That would be easier.

I often hate this building. Right now is one of those times. If it weren't for my wiffle bat and a mastery of wiffle bat kung fu, I'd be really freaked out.

Oh well, I make halfway decent money doing this and I can sue the money to obtain things I want. Like cool clothes. Or trips to places. Or sex toys.

Only another hour until I get the *bleep* out of here. Then veg out, then get poet, scope out our super secret plan, and head to the preverted picnic.

Good times.

Jake Bullet