Obsessed

I've been obsessed lately.

that's not at all unusual for me. Its actually normally a good thing. I get very enamored by a topic for a few days or a few weeks and then let it go. It helps me learn a little bit about alot of things. But usually I get obsessed with something political, cultural or historical. Major world events, some esoteric political maneuver or the newest curry recipe are normal sorts of temporary fascinations for me. Right now, I'm obsessed with something different.

I've been obsessed with collars. A specific type of collar really. Imagine this......but don't imagine very hard because I'll have a picture soon enough. For example, the picture right over there. Yes that one. The one of the collar on the boy. (And no, thats not me, though, truth be told, I'd fuck him.) A steel metal bar, less than 1/2 inch across thats been bent into a circle and placed around someone's neck. Add in an almost undetectable hinge and a small recessed allen screw holding it locked into place. Discrete enough to easily wear to the office and simple call "Neo-Industrial jewelry" when asked by the coworkers. Designed so its absolutely not coming off without a specially designed allen wrench to remove it. Just a simple steel ring that says so so much to the right people.

I really really want one and I don't know why. I want one and I want to wear it and never take it off. I have *never* had a thing for locking metal collars before. And certainly not as a 24/7 accessory. Don't get me wrong, the idea of being given a collar has always intrigued me and I look forward to the day I get collared, but I've always imagined it as a leather collar to be worn at home and with like minded people at munches and conventions. And without a lock. I've always been way too worried about what happens if I'm in the office and a bugler comes in to steal my shirt, then what would people say?? I mean besides "Woah, that dude just stole your shirt". They may say things like " Hey Jake, you work in a professional office...what are you doing with what looks like a collar on your neck...and why is there a lock???" That would be less than good for me as far as a job goes.

But these collars, I mean, I think they could be passed off as a "normal" piece of jewelry with a little thought and creative fibbing. "Oh yes, my partner got me that for our anniversary, its neo-industrial jewelry. I thought it looked really cool". That could explain away to the vanilla world why I would be openly wearing a collar. And to those in the lifetyle, it would simply be a collar, a semi-discrete one, but a collar none the less.

I have actually dreamed the last 2 nights about being collared with a collar like that. That's actually really the only parts I remember about the dreams. But the parts about the collar are clear as can fucking be. They were good dreams I think. I think this little obsession started when I was reading part of Jay Wiseman's book SM 101. (Absolutely great book, btw) He was describing collars and there significance, some things about different types of collars, and his views on collars. And something just kind of struck me and so I started surfing to different SM stores I knew of, looking at there collars. And I saw one at JT Stockroom that was an all metal ring with a small hinge and lock on it. That sort of started the fascination with the metal ones.

And what's funny, is the necklace I wear, well, it has been mistaken for a collar before. Its a small sterling silver row of double rings that sits very high on my neck. And it has no clasp, all there is a a small jumper ring which I need to use a needle nose pliers to slide open and closed. I can't remember the last time I took it off, but I do know that the last time I did, I felt totally naked without it. I kept reaching up to gently tug on it....something I do randomly alot of the time and I was truly confused when I would reach up for it and find nothing.

One day I hope to be gently tugging against a real collar. But for now, the necklace will do....

Feel free to share your thoughts.

Jake Bullet