S is for stupid

Yesterday was in many ways a red letter day. If the Red Letter is S for stupid.

I lost my Debit card at the mall. The place I get my hair done has a shitty card reader and so I had to use the ATM to get them cash. Which would be great if somewhere between the ATM the store and the door, I hadn't lost the card. But it was okay, I realized it soon enough to get it from mall security (the director of mall security must have a very very small penis if the gaudiness of your hat and uniform are any measure). I got my card back, called some people, hit another ATM (needed cash for drinks in the fruit loop) and drove to Andrew.

Except I left the card in the second ATM. Yes folks, I lost the same debit card (which I've had for years) twice in a 12 hour period....the second time, I hadn't even had the card for a full 30 minutes before I lost it. I was so busy on the phone that I ignored the loud beeping which occurred after I grabbed my cash and jumped into the car. Yeah.

Then, over dinner with the wonder twins (who aren't related and look nothing alike) and Andrew, I found out I had been subpoenaed. A guy vandalised a van at work back in september. And rather than pleading down to disorderly conduct or 4th degree lewd conduct with a kitchen appliance, he's going to court. After apparently firing atleast 4 public defenders and decieding to represent himself once every two weeks. My plan is to show up to court in ripped jeans and a hat that says "fuck you" on it. Then I'll say, when asked the first question, "I plead the 5th, until we work out the matter of this "Witness Fee" that your subpeona talked about". Thats when I'll get thrown in jail for contempt. Really, this case should have been plead out for the cost of damages plus a 500 dollar fine.

And last of all, I found a very nice present for someone. But I was unable to obtain it without my card. However, Andrew has come to the rescue on this.

Yes, yesterday was a red letter "S is for Stupid" day. Today i plan to spend the day looking for cars and then hanging with old co-workers who also have been ordered to court. Then Andrew and I might actually make it to the Fruit Loop.

Jake "S is for Stupid" Bullet

I'm back

Well, it seems that I've let my blog get way too dusty. Which is less good. And in many ways I've missed the opportunity to write. To process things by writing them down, to share funny stories and to just send whatever passes for coherent thoughts in my mind float out into the blogosphere.

Well, that and it was suggested by people that I resume blogging.

So yeah, here I am.

And, I'm not sure what to write. Which is somewhat amazing when you think about it. Alot has happened since my last entry. And, yeah, I don't know what to write.

So, I'll blog later tonight or tomorrow. Andrew and I are going boy hunting at what passes for gay leather bars in the area.

Jake